The Nicotine Chronicles-Day 14- F@(!$%

I can definitely taste the food a lot better. I still haven't figured out if that goes in the plus column or not. Constantly itching and fidgeting around like the drug that I'm trying to kick is Crack cocaine instead of what's normally found in cigarettes. The road to recovery is long and winding and I'm already getting dizzy. This is my story...

Oh My F*ckin' GoooAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHhhh. Today was a f*cked day!!!! I swear I almost killed someone. Laugh or cry if you want, but I was this close (place right hand in front of you and measure smallest distance between index and thumb without touching the two). I spent every minute of every f*ckin' hour thinkin' about smokin' a cigarette!!!!! How the hell is that possible? Even when I was smokin' I never craved the shyt that much! I feel like a crack head.


I am eating up every damn thing in sight. I don't miss a meal and the vending machine has become my best friend. I don't remember ever going through it like this before. It's almost two weeks and it only feels like it has been two days. I don't know how much longer I can take it. Don't wanna even think of relapse. I must drink some water and sleep now. DAMMIT!!!!!