Thug Passion

Now, I told you that I would write something else about "Delta" so here it is. Mind you, she is a very good friend. I think the world of her and respect her to the utmost. As a matter of fact, in a drunken stupor, I told her that I really wanted to be more than friends at one time. Not that it wasn't the truth, just that it wasn't a good time. You know how if you don't say something when you probably should, just leave it alone? Yeah, that was what that was. Alcohol can do that to you. Especially after consuming almost an entire bottle of Grey Goose mixed with splashes of Red Bull. Wings my ass. I was knocked on my ass less than two hours after her arrival to my house.

Anyway, this story takes place almost two years ago. A friend of mine, who people say looks a lot like Tupac, called me asking if I was going out to Rumours (the only club in Oahu that jumps on a Friday night). I told him that I was and that I was bringing my homegirl Delta along also. Immediately he was like, "How does she look?" I told him that she was fine and everything and this piqued his curiosity. He asked that if she was fine why wasn't I was talking to her, and I knew then that he was ready to pounce. I should have said that I was hollering at her, if not only because at that time I was really feeling her, but to protect her from his ass. I succumbed to the truth and uttered a pathetic, "We're just friends". He then said that he was getting dressed and that he was coming over. It was apparent that he was trying to get dibs on her and I can't really say that I was mad at him.

Now this is where things started going bad. Before he came over, Delta and I had a very long, and rather serious conversation about relationships. About how things go wrong, what we were looking for, and how we haven't quite found it. I was feeling closer to her at that time and immediately regretted that technically, just released a hound on her. I don't fault my man, I mean, when you are out there, you're out there. I don't hate on anyone. I just, for some reason, regretted that after what we had shared, that I sorta released a pending storm to which she was unaware of. I guess I just figured that she would see through him and that would be that.

Well, he gets to the house and I introduce the two. When she wasn't looking I caught him glancing at her from head to toe and then looking at me in agreement to my prior description of her. I had the feeling this was going to be a long night. So we continue drinking over my crib, chopping it up a little, all the while stalling until it was time to leave. I went upstairs to get ready and could already hear him striking up a conversation. One thing about Delta, she will talk to anybody. I mean she is just very polite like that. Not saying that his conversation wasn't interesting, but merely pointing out that anyone that would approach her, say, at a club, would get a smile and a polite greeting. This can be mistaken for interest by many people and oft times it is.

Well as it turns out, my boy was still married. Though he was going through a divorce, that didn't matter. Well Delta found out before I did and she was pissed. How she found out, I don't really know. She was noticeably hurt, and very upset at the fact that I would try to set her up with someone who was married. She felt betrayed and utterly disrespected. What did that say about what I thought about her? Here I was supposed to be her friend and...well, you get the picture.

The truth of the matter is I thought he was divorced. That is what I was led to believe. I would not have knowingly done anything like that to disrespect her. Could I tell her this on that particular night? Hell no!!! She was too through with my ass for a while. I mean, me and this dude, along with countless other people who I later found out were married, were running the streets of Australia chasing after women. Imagine how I felt when we returned to the States and I get invited over their house to a BBQ and I realize that these cats are, in fact, "happily married!!!" What do I say to the wife when she engages in a converstation with me?

Wife: What's your name again?
Me: I go by Nev or B.
Wife: Okay, well make yourself at home.
Me: Thank you.
Wife: You're very welcome. How did you meet Jerry?
Me: Oh, I met dude on deployment at a club. He had this fine ass female with him. When I approached the bar he had his face just buried in her cleavage and shyt. Man, after that me and him would run the streets of Sydney trying to hit every bad chick in sight! Ummmm....is this Blue Cheese or Ranch? I only ask because I'm allergic to Blue Cheese. Hello?

Of course there were no conversations like that, but you know what I am saying. I did feel weird and there were several BBQs where that was the case. Me putting a face to another person's wife knowing all of the stuff we were into when we were gone. Hell, they were running around getting into more shyt than the single cats.

Well, it took about a year and a half before she really forgave me for that incident. I mean, we still kicked it, but I knew that was still in the back of her mind somewhere. I guess I just have to do a full background investigation before I ever try to hook any of my homegirls up with my boys again. Hell, maybe I just shouldn't do it at all? Yeah, that would be the safe route, huh?

I got mine, you better get yours!

Now that line was taken from Bernie Mac's performance on the Kings of Comedy. While he was talking about an orgasm, I am referring to...well, an orgasm, but one achieved by non-coital means.
Now I am sure this has been talked about a lot, blogged about to no end, but the reason I am bringin' this up is due to a conversation that I had recently with one of my best friends.

First let me tell you about her. I have been knowing...well, let's call her "Delta", for about 3 yrs. We really didn't start getting close until about two years ago. We originally met through another friend a year or so prior to my returning from deployment in early '04. Why she wasn't already married and having baby showers every year, I don't know. Beautiful woman with an even more beautiful personality and heart. We hung out a lot, be it going to clubs, or bars or whatever. Hell, I will blog about one other incident regarding her before the day is over. But for now, let's get into the conversation.

She made a statement to me and another friend of mine while we were out on my lanai (balcony, patio...I got you) drinking and smoking a cigarette. Now I don't know why it came out her mouth, or even what we were talking about at the time. Maybe we were talking about relationships or meeting people in the club or bars. I don't remember,anyway, she said that if a guy doesn't like to perform oral sex then he can basically just keep walking. No need engaging in conversation. Not that it would be the key point for her to talk to him, just that if it does progress to sex later on in whatever courtship that might evolve, that it could be an issue. Now I raised an eyebrow and I began to think, "Where the hell did that come from? I wonder what the hell...

is going on...
...in her mind? I'm sorry. Some of those were my thoughts, I'm sure. A certain someone, who for now, we will call "Princess", faked me out on bringing me some Coldstone two days in a row. Yeah, her crown is getting a little too tight. (j/k, J) Moving on, I guess I understood her gripe. I know I expect a female to hook me up, maybe not on the first date, but not too much longer after that. But I know how I feel about doing the same for someone that I really don't know that well. I don't do it! I have to get in real good and know her for a while before I even consider performing that act. I know it ain't fair, but...well, it ain't fair. Don't get me wrong, I like hooking my girl up. Did you see the peaches? Nah, but I just don't make it a habit of burying my face in everyone. Not a good practice.

Now I am sitting here listening to her complaints. They are the usual. Not saying that they aren't warranted, I'm just saying that it is the same argument. I thought that we as men have gotten past the high school stuff. You know, where you sit with your fellas and say something like, "As long as my (expletive) still gets hard, I don't need to eat no (expletive)!"

Well there was this one guy in school who got busted out in the cafeteria by one of his ex-girlfriends about their past bedroom experiences. Apparently he enjoyed going down on her. What's messed up is that I am certain she enjoyed it too, but at this particular moment she felt the need to bust him out in front of all his boys. Now we were all over him. Laughing, joking, and prodding him for the rest of the time we were in High School. Freshmen knew him as "Beaver". I look back on that day and realize, well he was dumb by all conventional means, but he was way ahead of us when it came to that. No wonder his ass didn't stay without a woman for long. I mean, even though he wasn't the best looking cat in the world, he always had someone waiting in the wings. Interesting... I guess we coulda learned something from him.

Hearing Delta express her feelings made me realize that there are people still out there who haven't graduated. Though happily in a relationship now, she still remembered some encounters, I guess. I just never really had that problem. If I didn't want to go down on a female I just fell asleep. But the subject did kinda catch me by surprise. You know, the unspoken,"You do me and I'll do you." I remember some comedian said, "Whoever doesn't get done first, doesn't get done." That might have even been Bernie Mac too. Can't remember but that is sometimes painfully true. How many times have you finished her up and then she cleverly pulls you up and whispers in your ear for you to handle your business? Women are smarter than we could ever be. I usually tell 'em, "In a minute, but you got some business you need to tend to." As for the selfish people out there...I can't hate. If they keep coming back then what you are giving them is enough. If you don't get any callbacks then...well, I guess as long as you got yours...